No regrets

There is that moment where we look at our child and realize that they are no longer our dear sweet baby but are now on their way to adolescence. And while I go through some soul searching which will be documented shortly in my other blog, I realize that my life has been so blessed by my son.

Tonight I am very sad. My mom's wonderful friend GayAnn lies in the hospital on life support. Life support that isn't going to change anything... that the end result will still be the end of her life. GayAnn is one of the people who I consider to be an honorary grandparent to Toby. Since Mike is not in my life and his family is long gone too, I have found people along the way who act in the place of grandparents that he won't ever have. As a result of these people coming into his life, my life has been blessed.

I look at how my life has been transformed in the past almost three years. And I look at this sweet precious gift that God has allowed me to have in my life. And I realize that there is no moment of pain, no moment of those years I spent with Mike that I would trade if it meant giving up this wonderful child. In all of that smartness, that smart butt humor, that smile that lights up my world; I have begun to heal.